All through the streets and all through the night,
the stars were shining but none were bright
It was Xmas eve and Santa was grinning
His time had come with the children sleeping

With grenades in his pocket and guns in his sack,
he took a moment to jerk off his jack
After he gasped, he abseiled the chimney
and found Danny and Sally so innocent and dreamy

“I’ll cut their heads off and leave a present for Mom
Ho, ho! What fun this job is when the flesh is a bomb”

At the glint of his knife, the Moon rushed a call:
“Quick, the kids need help (send one who’s good in the maul)”

Before Santa could jump-step, there was a flash of teeth
An indignant Tooth Fairy said “I’ll show you whose chief”
“Ho, ho, this women’s lib is not that spooky
I’ve been challenged by heteros – you’re just a tutti frutti”
But she demonstrated her karate by dropping his pants
and instead of a blowjob, she taught the Bobbitt dance
The reindeer were laughing with a season glow
‘cause it’s funny when Santa’s searching for his dick in the snow

All through the streets and all through the night,
the stars were shining with so much bright
It was Xmas and Santa did no more sinning
Festive cheer had travelled its way to winning.

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